Suicide Is Not Painless.. It Hurt’s But We Must Move On In Style

I am absolutely gutted this week of hearing the news yesterday that Keith Flint from The Prodigy one of my biggest inspirations to create unique electronically fused music in life took his own life on Monday in the UK. So much so that this week just feels out of place going about business as usual without paying some proper tribute to this incredible front man and the epitome of what is means to have personal style. Today’s blog is dedicated to Keith Flint’s aesthetic and how much it has inspired me over these now many years. I wear my hair parted in the middle today to pay homage in my own way. Shaving my head is not my style but Keith sure rocked it like no other.

A little back story as to why Keith Flint inspired me so very deeply. Me at 13 years old. Living in an abusive household with seemingly no way out at the time. I was cutting myself every week, starting to experiment with drugs and alcohol to numb the pain and hated every waking minute I had to spend at home isolated from the world. I was on a quarter horse breeding ranch with the nearest neighbor being 5 miles away in either direction. The nearest town was at least 30 minutes away by car. There where no sidewalks in rural Southern Alberta. There was only miles of highway and out here no one can hear you scream. I was the kid that actually looked forward to going to school because it meant I had time away from my so called “parents”. 
Insert The Prodigy’s performance in 1997 on The MTV Video Music Award’s which that at the time I watched religiously every year. I had of course already seen the music videos “Breath”, “Firestarter” and the then banned from TV “Smack My Bitch Up”. All of which I loved and Fat of The Land was on heavy rotation in my Discman. Yes, I said Discman. MP3’s where not yet a thing. 1997 however would then go onto being one of the best years for music we would see in our lifetimes. 
During their performance on the VMA’s I would go onto see a range of emotion I did not know was humanely possible to express on the outside. Never mind the fact that Keith was able to express this range of utter mental insanity in such a short under 4 minute amount of time. It was everything I was feeling in my life on a daily basis at that poignant time. They performed Breath. Keith snarled, he jumped, almost levitated, spewed saliva over the crowd, and cackled like a mad hatter.
I was able to get a few screenshots of this. Still to this day one of the most heavy performances I have ever fucking seen in my life. The crowd looked like an invasion of maggots in a filed. Simultaneously breathing in movement together to the beat of the music. The stage looked like a strobing bug zapper in the middle a pitch black night that these maggots could not help but be drawn towards.

You can watch this full performance in here. I highly recommend it.
Here are also some of my favorite looks of Keith’s both on and off stage over the years. It just goes to show you his versatility. If you have been reading this blog you will know that I am a huge fan of menswear. Not only on men but on women as well. 
His dumbo the punk rave clown gone mad look in the Firestarter video

This tied red & black yarn look reminded me of a Clive Barker movie meets Alexander McQueen

His use of patches to always customize everything he wore. D.I.Y to be fly. 

His more buttoned up event looks. Such a great contrast of hardcore and preppy style. One of which I pull from a lot in life.

Classic white long sleeved and suspenders. Top notch.
The leopard print trim on his well tailored jacket. Over sized belt and signature locks. Even though he aged he never looked dated because he wasn’t putting on a facade. (A lesson most “rockstars” from previous generations & current could take notes from. Ahem, bandanna’s anyone?)
Lastly, Him and his dog in the country. Even when he was more casual off stage he still oozed personal style. You can see the monkey print inserted among his plaid patterned shirt if you look closely.
So where do we go from here? Personally All my greats are now officially gone. Wendy O Williams, Lemmy Kilmister, Peter Steel, David Bowie, Prince etc…  Everyone I’ve loved from afar is dead. I’m somewhere between angry and sad since yesterday. All I know is that personally for me I’ve come a long way since discovering The Prodigy. My self harming days are long behind me now. Suicide is not at the forefront of my mind (It never goes away but it can retreat farther into the subconscious if you keep pushing back). I take a much more positive approach to life now. It’s been 16 years in the making to get here. No matter what happens I put my best foot forward each and every day. As much as some days I wish I could do nothing but stay in bed I force myself to get dressed and hit life in the face with my own personal style. Like it or not.
If your struggling out there just know I went through it too. I was right there with you. I am now what it looks like to make it to the other side because I am still here. Life will be through with me when it’s though with me. Not when I am through with it. I refuse to take myself out of this existence. Why? Because with the bad comes the good. Sometimes it takes things getting really dark in order to be able to see the light again. Just know there is always a way through despair. Just keep going. Don’t fucking die on your watch.
Personal Style Breakdown:

Sheer Dress by Kimchi Blue – $2
Patent Leather Boots – $30
Pleather Jacket- $5
Total Look Cost: $37
Until next week you can check out my links below. I have a weekly Podcast “Metal Mindset which goes live every Wednesday. “This Week In Metal” is my Youtube series which also goes live every Thursday. You can also be a contributor to my next Metal Mouth Style Blog on My Patreon Page

See you next Monday for more Metal Mouth Style

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